Right here lyes the frame of M. Samuel Brown
Dec’d Would possibly ye 3d 1739 within the 43d 12 months of his age
Deficient Sam Brown. His slate tombstone has grown moss-covered in simply the six years since I noticed him ultimate, and extra of his neighbors’ memorials have cracked and crumbled. The decade has taken extra of a toll than the prior 300 and fifty-odd years.
Now he has to take a seat in stony silence on the Cove Burying Flooring in Eastham, on Cape Cod, whilst I step at the blades of grass that sprout from his grave, looking to piece in combination relationships, one great-grandfather via one great-grandmother at a time, over two acres of grass jeweled with morning dew.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
It’s true: Via the circle of relatives tree, I’m a Pilgrim, or no less than from them. However I’m a nasty Puritan. I’ve violated just about each and every rule the Puritans sought after enforced. I’ve now not long past forth and procreated. An 18-year-old cat is in control of my non secular life. I’ve sinned, although in essentially the most unremarkable tactics.
To a few, I’m a nasty American—a Deep Southerner who’s wandered off the political reservation whilst I’ve bodily moved nearer to its beating purple middle, a spot the place ersatz Puritans are as soon as once more those steerage the send.
We could have taken to soil first in Plymouth, however I do know my folks come from elsewhere. I head for that protected harbor, and hope nonetheless feels as welcoming because it did earlier than our nationwide divisions hardened into ominous divides.
I had began this morning in Plymouth, the place I knew a few of my ancestors had stood, 400 years in the past, in search of freedom in their opting for. My wishes have been more practical: a McMuffin, espresso, and DC fast-charging for the Rivian R1S that may shipping me towards a deeper figuring out of my tribe.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
First encounters
I wave a “‘until subsequent time” to Sam, then apply the street north from Eastham, in tandem with the a part of the Cape Cod Pilgrim Touchdown Path that leads the entire technique to the top of the Cape, to look the dunes as they might were noticed via cautious eyes that watched the Pilgrims means masses of years in the past.
I flip north on Race Level Highway, the place kayakers flow silently throughout a Wyeth-perfect panorama, and wend towards the north face of the Cape, the place I uncover you’ll take your SUV off-road—for those who’re correctly equipped. The R1S has the power to cruise on right here with its off-road force modes, its proficient traction techniques, its top flooring clearance, and its bluff ends. Oversand seaside riding at the Cape Cod Nationwide Seaside calls for a allow and a few elementary take on, together with all- or four-wheel force, which the Quad-Motor R1S has, and a tow strap and shovel, which I don’t.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
I don’t fail to see a lot. Don’t get me improper, the Rivian is succesful, but it surely’s extra essential in this commute as a messenger: We will have our Made in The us pleasure and romantic imagery of our previous, whilst we query what lies beneath and do higher. No fossils right here, simply gas for our long term.
I accept a stroll to the highest of the dunes and glance over the sea and spot what the Nauset tribe of the Wampanoag folks could have noticed, earlier than what we name the “First Come upon.” Like maximum tales of colonists and the colonized, it’s much less satisfied than what we have been taught simply 50 years in the past. About 4 thousand local American citizens lived at the Cape earlier than the Pilgrims arrived. The ones Nauset folks had, by the point of the 1620 crossing, already noticed a few of their folks abducted and brought to Europe to be dehumanized and exploited, whilst the remaining have been decimated via plague that had killed as many as 100,000 folks within the earlier 3 years. They’d reason why to concern the folk at the send they’ll have noticed in early November, circling across the shore.
Map of the Day: After casting anchor in Provincetown, the Pilgrims set out within the Mayflower’s shallop (a small boat) to brush Cape Cod Bay for a extra hospitable position. This hand-drawn map from June 1953 strains the shallop’s path to Plymouth, “a spot have compatibility for state of affairs.” #MapOTD %.twitter.com/vTMWjVCe0I
— NatGeoMaps (@NatGeoMaps) November 20, 2018
Pilgrims and development
The Mayflower swept previous the sandy seaside, below grey skies and the consistent risk of sleet and snow—in the end, in the end, to land. Hustled to sea very past due, on September 6, 1620, headed for the Virginia colony, it were at the open sea for 9 weeks when the Cape got here into view. Passengers had died or turn into gravely unwell, and the boat reeked of human dust, however nonetheless, inside of, the ones passengers noticed a brand new global and new lives—whilst the ones on shore noticed extra bother at the horizon.
At the Mayflower they have been indentured servants, babies, better halves, sailors, chefs. Maximum have been non secular self-exiles, from the Church of England and England itself. They’d drifted to Holland, till they noticed their youngsters changing into too Dutch. They boarded the send all over again, past due that summer season. All have been Pilgrims—however simplest maximum have been Puritans. At the send, some “strangers” who had not anything to do with Puritanism had boarded, simplest in the hunt for financial and political freedom.
I force to the west facet of the city, following the overall course of the Mayflower because it sought out a protected harbor. The boat had sailed the period of Cape Cod from the primary sight of land on November 5, 1620, till it hit shallows and grew to become north, curving westward with the solar round Race Level. It rounded the cape and anchored close to a place off the hooked finish on November 11, 1620, the place a birthday celebration set foot, signed the Mayflower Compact, and agreed to band in combination.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
Some name it the basis of American democracy—however that too calls for extra learn about. Now not a lot was once democratic of their undertaking. The Puritans have been strict moralists; simplest their imaginative and prescient of God was once the proper one. They have been reformers and separatists who sought after to obliterate the outdated tactics of worship and create a brand new utopia below non secular authority—no democracy in any respect.
However this spot, that might someday be Provincetown, would now not suffice. They wanted a greater position to safe haven and to develop meals than the sandy, hilly terrain of the Cape. Whilst maximum on board accumulated firewood, washed filthy garments, and fumigated the send with branches of juniper, a group constructed a small boat and explored the shore for weeks, looking for a greater position to wintry weather. They put foot on shore close to modern day Eastham, and made first touch with the Nauset, close to what someday would turn into the Cove Burying Flooring.
The “First Come upon” proved transient: A birthday celebration of Pilgrims set foot at the sand, explored the woods, and ran from it screaming as arrows sang via them—the caution pictures fired via Nauset who had reason why to concern the foreigners. On December 16, 1620, after a number of conflicts with the Nauset, the Mayflower instructed out into Cape Cod Bay and driven westward, directly to the Pilgrims’ subsequent vacation spot, the following position the place they may well be nearer to utopia—a spot the place they have been in unquestioned command.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
From Provincetown to “P-The town”
The odor of P-The town hits like smelling salts. Musty ocean breezes mingle with freshly minimize grass. Dank weed problems from the hashish retail outlets at the Industrial Side road strip, and entangles itself with the tacky curlicues of Spiritus’ bowling-alley pizza and the sugary whiff of Portuguese malasadas.
It’s all soundtracked via the babble of curler baggage on cobblestones and the babble of folks as they migrate towards the quick ferry again to Boston. There, something’s nonetheless because it was once masses of years in the past: the shouts of town crier. Provincetown nonetheless has one, after all, simplest now the crier’s a Broadway queen.
One of the vital Pilgrims would possibly have had a stroke, one observer informed NPR, in the event that they noticed what Provincetown, after the Pilgrims, had turn into: most probably the queerest position on earth, in line with capita, in line with diem, in line with then again you wish to have to calculate it.
Samuel Brown couldn’t have recognized that, by some means, masses of years later, considered one of his descendants can be penning this to you from a desk at one of the crucial gayest puts in Provincetown. He wouldn’t have even understood what “homosexual” was once, since queerness as identification wasn’t in point of fact a factor till the latter part of the nineteenth century, simply because the native whaling business crashed. It was a haven for “creative” folks, within the coded body of the day. Puts flip queer when they are able to’t have enough money to show queers away.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
Provincetown has been enshrined as a queer position for the reason that early 1900s, and now it’s a capital of queerness. It has turn into synonymous with the archipelago of puts that my tribe arrange around the globe the place shall we congregate, pilgrims of every other type with every other undertaking: Key West, Bondi, the Castro, Boystown, Decatur. To a few, Provincetown was once and stays a sin vacation spot, a helltown. To the individuals who make pilgrimages right here each and every summer season, it turns into a neighborhood. A spot to be.
For a decade, we made an annual pilgrimage to Provincetown each and every July—and as expensive because it’s turn into, it’s nonetheless excellent to be again, after six lengthy years. Little has modified. Drag presentations take in maximum each and every marquee: reality-TV champions elbow apart the endearing oddness of Dina Martina and the muscular camp of Varla Jean Merman. Cabaret presentations, a Wayland Plant life and Madame homage.
As it’s necessarily an “different,” too—a powertrain perversion of SUV custom whenever you scratch at its paint—the Rivian suits proper in. Once I force down Industrial Side road looking for a parking spot, I understand who notices the SUV. It’s nonetheless new and unheralded sufficient to be a standing image in a spot the place shirtless younger Romanian guys pedal-cab folks for pointers down the primary drag. The R1S will get the approving nod of the “flip-flop, tank best, don’t forestall” crowd lining up for tea dance on the Boatslip, and from the landlord of a ‘76 Eldorado parked discreetly in a storage—as discreetly as any ‘76 Eldo can also be.
It’s reassuring to gauge the reactions, whilst pedestrians need to stroll immediately into the R1S’s trail. I am getting it. I too am within the thrall of its 4 electrical motors, its easy and immediate acceleration, and—to make certain—the raffish profile it cuts. The Rivian belongs right here. So does everybody, any individual. What Provincetown as soon as was once, it has turn into once more: a safe haven.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
Monuments to the previous
No parking spots seem any place close to the place I need to dock the R1S for the weekend. The one technique to pass is up. I wind across the block down Bradford Side road towards the top level of the excursion of Cape Cod—the tallest granite development within the nation, the place parking is a measly $20.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
The Provincetown Museum at Pilgrim Monument provides a latter-day monument to people who we honor as conquerors. Like later generations of Civil Battle monuments, this one was once christened within the eyes of people that sought after to enshrine Puritans as a shining ethical pressure. It’s complicated in context, a granite Italianate exclamation level that tacks down town as though it have been in peril of blowing away.
On a excellent day you’ll see Plymouth from the highest of the 252-foot-tall Pilgrim Monument, whenever you climb its 166 steps and 60 ramps on what occurs to be the most up to date day of the summer season. At the manner up, I contact the marble plaques that mark the founding of Massachusetts cities. I be aware that Foxborough got here into life in 1681 they usually simplest have 5 Tremendous Bowl rings to turn for it. Do higher, Foxborough.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
I achieve the highest, soaking wet in sweat, and glance over the tennis courts the place I’ve foot-faulted, the attic residences the place I’ve slept off a hangover, then grew to become to the outlet pierced into the stone, the only going through south—the place the Mayflower would have dropped anchor. And simply as briefly, I beat the trail back off into the accompanying museum.
Air-con we could me soak within the panels of historical past that mark now not simplest the Monument’s building all through the peak of the generation of monuments—the early 1900s, when essential males felt the wish to commemorate imposed glory whilst it already was once appearing indicators of its inherent weak point—but additionally the tale of Provincetown’s queer heritage and most significantly, the tale of the Wampanoag country and the Nauset folks. In the end—cultural alternate takes time even in an excessively innovative spot at the map—the Pilgrim Monument and Provincetown Museum has made the Wampanoag tale a part of its everlasting revel in. It’s an said a part of the tale.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
Discovering your tribe
I will be able to hint my circle of relatives again to The us as early as 1625 via Cookes and Doanes and Hardings and Rings—ur-American names, all—however the oldest grave I’ve but noticed is that of Samuel Brown.
How did he get right here? Neatly, after his forebears landed in Plymouth, and determined it wasn’t Puritanical sufficient, they struck out for a spot of their very own at the Cape. I cruise via him once more a couple of days later, at the commute again house, the place he lies within the Cove cemetery along side his father, William, and mom, Mary Murdoch.
Cove is the one Cape Cod cemetery with Mayflower passengers, it seems, many in unmarked graves. Different burials were marked via a gravestone and a footstone, to indicate the individual lies in mattress in everlasting sleep. Nonetheless others, like Samuel Brown’s marker, have elaborate carving on them, with wings and crossed bones superimposed via a cranium. If it sounds creepy, it’s in fact relatively gorgeous. When rainy, the slate is going ink black once more, the image of gravitas, with the entire splotches of inexperienced that colonize it.

Rivian R1S traveling Cape Cod
It sort of feels unusual to prevent and say a prayer or to stake a small American flag in his honor, since I wouldn’t know anything else concerning the former and he by no means knew the starred-and-striped latter. He will get toasted with a Dunkin’ massive iced latte as an alternative.
What would he take into consideration that—or about me? Possibly the similar issues that the Puritans assume again house, the place it’s now not all the time comfy to discuss present occasions with well-meaning folks. The place, while you take a look at to provide an explanation for how lives are being made unlawful once more, you’re responded with a shrug. The place the very concept of protected harbors—protected areas—is met with scorn.
You will need to be in the ones puts, to face for tolerance and acceptance, even if awkward war of words is the most productive I will be able to set up. It’s because the Provincetown museum mildly passes off the historical past of the First Come upon: “sophisticated.”
It’s much more essential to grasp the place we belong. Provincetown, as some distance away as it can be lots of the yr, is the place all my tribes come in combination. Possibly subsequent time, it gained’t were six years between visits. I will be able to’t wait too lengthy, I do know. Some other six years and Samuel Brown’s slate tombstone could have crumbled into unreadable fragments.
Till then, after I call to mind the place I’m discovered, I will be able to call to mind this position—of the street to Race Level because it races towards sundown, the place Cape gentle flatters the panorama with unheralded amber, the place the ocean grass bends and waves hi because it welcomes me again.